How New Year Divides Us: Second Edition

It's sad watching 2010 draw to a close. I couldn't have ask for a better year. It was my absolute favorite year thus far; good times, everyday miracle, watching and laughing at life life, exploring beauty and strength, and beginning the art of trusting people. Even though much of this past year was in the States, it was global nomadic themed which greatly improved upon it's massive success. But success was truly found in the amazing people I encountered.

Originally I planned to reflect back on the top 10 events of the year...but 10 expanded...and kept expanding...and I'm a writer so we're notoriously bad at self-editing.

1) New Years in Atlanta with my dearest friend Olivia, seeing David Crowder Band, Chris Tomlin, Matt Redman, Beth Moore, and John Piper live, along with thousands of young people in the Philips Arena seeking service-based lives.

2) Living with hilarious people in a rundown drafty and foodie-obsessed house over the spring semester; playing board games, watching at Winter Olympics, lots of homemade bread and soup and playing in snow storms.

3) Establishing myself as the owner of a bachelor's degree while my mom, grandparents, aunt and uncle, and special friend Lorraine all stood with me.

4) Spending 10 summer weeks in Washington DC. I learned what I don't want to do with my life, but discovered someone who I enjoy spending my life with...finding green spaces, photographic spots, and good coffee.

5) Becoming the proud owner of a Fuji Newest 3.0 and biking down the Met-Branch Trail at 9pm with the Capital Building glowing at the end of the trail. This is epic in the truest sense.

6) A whirlwind BWI/DC/NYC roadtrip with my parents, the highlights being walking along DC bike trails with Jon and lapping Central Park NYC three times on my new bike in my new biking gear.

7) Three months with my family and grandparents, building relationships with them and enjoying their company; kayaking and tubing in the Adirondacks, taking my sister to college, and biking along County Route 13 (yes, on the Fuji Newest 3.0).

8) Remembering and celebrating Darrell Hercyk's life.

9) Getting the job I always wanted, with the organization I wanted, in the field I wanted, in a region I wanted, in this economic climate...that was a miracle...

10) Taking Jon to my favorite places around New York because beautiful places must be shared.

11) Going out to Stoneybrook Farm in Filer Idaho to visit my lovely friend Sarah; eating the freshest veggies in the world, packing seasonal baskets, driving a tractor, seeing the Rockies, and walking on the Oregon Trail.

12) Twice meeting Sudanese Catholic clergy building peace in Sudan while the country counts-down to separation and possible violence, and knowing that a united and peaceful church really can make a difference even if our governments are doing nothing.

13) Moving to Asia...by myself...in two suitcases...and blind faith.

My theme for the year was "Big." I knew this time last year everything was going to be big in 2010. I mean, I was graduating! I knew life would change and that the changes would be drastic. I wanted to believe that a big God would orchestrate what I needed for the future. It was a test to myself. Did I trust God was big enough? It's a self-examination I will continually reapply. My "Big" year meant overcoming big fears and conquering big steps, and breaking down big issues in small pieces and solving them one by one; transitioning into "grown-up" from college student and peacebuilder from simply quizzical inquirer.

I'm indeed sad closing this chapter. But a new year starts; new miracles, new challenges, new strangeness and bizarreness, new beauty and strength and the opportunity to take on Asia. New Years are different for everyone, literally and figuratively (I live in Cambodia, we celebrate the New Year on three calendars). But we all want the new year to be better then the last so maybe it unites us more then I previously thought.

How to Celebrate Christmas In Phnom Penh

I didn't really plan Christmas. Christmas activities fell in my lap this year. Sometimes when things fall in your lap you know someone is looking out for you.

Christmas Eve: Christmas Eve was perfect. I talked to all my family (and then some!), ate pancakes, went shopping, ate at KFC (even though I hate meat and fried foods), spent several hours updating computer software. And then, off to Mass with six other MCCers. There was a full on rendition of Jingle Bell Rock and Deck the Halls in addition to all the traditional Christmas hymns and precious small children doing a nativity play. From there, I ventured onto a friend's house where some of my house-church friends/coworkers had prearranged a Christmas Eve sleepover. There were eight of us who stayed over and several others who came over in the morning for brunch. We strung up mosquito nets on the veranda; ate our favorite foreign foods, played games and stayed up till 11:30pm which is the Cambodian equivalent to three am.

Christmas Day: Christmas brunch! I stayed over till well past noon the next day before I really couldn’t function anymore because I was puking up strange foods. So I slept, watched "Love Actually" and "The Queen" and didn't go out to my favorite Khmer restaurant with friends where the rice comes in a giant pineapple. We did watch Harry Potter 7 so that was fun.

Boxing Day: I tried to go to church but church was not occurring given the holiday festivities. And so I went out for French toast and treated myself to new music...and watched a movie...and a nap.

All in all, it was a good Christmas. It was my first Christmas tout de seule, my first Christmas in Cambodia, my first post-uni Christmas, so many firsts. I cannot complain. In fact, I really can't complain, me and my two-liter bottle of Sprite.

How Christmas Unites Us: Second Edition

I've been avoiding Christmas this year. It's for my own good. I miss my grandparents, my parents, my sister, my bros, my aunts and uncles...my friends. I only arrived in Phnom Penh eight weeks ago so while I have new friends here, I'm inherently and undeniably new...and this does not help when thoughts of previous Christmases come to mind.

Christmas in North America is surrounded by traditions which don't apply to me. I grew up without the lights, the cold weather, the Santa myth, the holiday parties, and the extravaganza of commercialism and the related gift giving complications. My Christmases were simpler. But this Christmas, I'm not around any family or any close friends. And as such, I'm avoiding Christmas. I find solace in the knowledge that this arrangement isn't permanent. I'll spend Christmases with my family in the future and I look forward to having great friends here next year here in Phnom Penh. Nothing is permanent in the global nomadic life, nothing is for sure, and everything is flexible (which drives even the most die-hard global nomad crazy).

Still, I can't completely ignore Christmas. I find myself thinking about expectations. Christmas is shrouded in expectations and anticipation, a buildup to a day of community and happiness. I'm not building my expectations around Christmas. I'm building expectations around other things, such as creating community here, Southern Sudanese independence, moving into my first apartment and hanging art on my bare white walls, hosting my family in May (the icing on the cake!), speaking Khmer with my partner (who speak precious little English), and learning to find and experience joy and peace in new places. Perhaps less concrete, perhaps less measurable, but I live in constant expectation for these moments, in permanent reverence in our flexible and irreverent world. In our global nomadic world, it's impossible to pin our happiness to one thing or even in tradition. We learn to expect and accept odd blessings from strange places.

And so we are united by our desire to find community. But community isn't linked to a date or a holiday but a lifestyle of open hearts and minds.

How to Drive in Phnom Penh

• Today I flipped an illegal u-turn on a red light. It would have been illegal in the States. I'm not so sure in Cambodia but it felt awesome to avoid the left-hand turn and no one else seemed to care.
• Today I made multiple left turns through oncoming traffic. The trick is to slow down to a crawl and creep/pray your way through.
• Today I watched a black SUV run a red light and come within half a foot of hitting me in the middle of a major intersection. I was furious...and stunned. I understand why everyone hates cars.
• Today I forgot to shift down, and stalled trying to pull out of another major intersection while literally several dozen motos (and tuks tuks!) were flying ahead all around me.
• Today I went around a roundabout twice. The first time was brilliant. The second time there were too many SUVs for me to pull off and when I finally managed to turn, I backtracked around the edge of the roundabout about 20 yards for my street.
• Today I drove on the wrong side of the road, but it's okay if it's only for a short distance. When traffic subsided ever so slightly, I moved to the correct side.
• Today I floored my little moto until I got up to 26mph. I thought I was flying. I've never gone so fast before, ever.
• Today I only used my blinkers once. Honestly, what the heck are those for anyway? It's not like you'd want to look down to turn them and no one else does!
• Today I didn't want to wait at a stop light, so I drove through a gas station and around the block.
• Today I parked on the sidewalk, but in my defense it had been turned into a parking lot and the pedestrians were walking on the road.
• And yes, today I also drove on the sidewalk.
• This was just today.

I was going to blog about driving in Cambodia. But apparently my short trip for lunch and wheat flour was interesting enough. There are no timid drivers in Cambodia. There are only drivers and aggressive drivers. I'm progressing towards aggressive but I'm still due for my new driver "incident" so we shall see. They are never serious incidents and I always travel with my phone and my very fashionable red helmet...and 5000 riel in the event of fines ($1.5).

Drive as fast as you can (if you go above 20mph you're flying), drive aggressively, drive anywhere there's space, and remember the pecking order; cars, tuk tuks, motos, bikes, and finally, at the very end, people. Oh and don't drive during the day with your headlight on because that's the only real offense you could be fined for.

How to Explain Unexpected Rain

It poured last Monday for several hours. It was very nice, cooling down the hot day. Rain empties the streets because you can't drive a moto, tuk tuk or bike when it's raining down sheets.

The unusually heavy and unseasonal rain was partially attributed to the Water Festival stampede deaths. The spirit world is unsettled and disturbed by the large number of unexpected deaths. Cambodian tradition suggests that for six days, the soul of the dead wanders around unaware they are actually dead. They'll try and go home so their family members will place food outside the house to keep them from entering the house. A Buddhist monk will circle the house chanting to create a type of spell which prevents the spirits from entering the house. If they enter their former home, they'll become ghosts and haunt the house. Often, intense and bananas or other food are set up on the sidewalk, even more appeasement and enticement. Sometimes, little model cars and houses are burned along with the incense so that the spirits will have all their needs met in the spirit world and have no desire to return home.

On the seventh day after their death, a spirit will finally realize that they've died. Since they can't go home, and they know their dead, they'll accept it and disappear into the spirit world.

There are three funerals after someone dies. The day after they die, the seventh day after they die (which is when the dead spirit realizes it's dead) and then 100 days afterwards to fully appreciate the passage of time. Sometimes, for cost efficiency, the seventh and 100 day funerals are rolled into one. During a funeral, it's perfectly acceptable to set up a massive tent in the street and play loud music and chanting over a PA system during each three-day funeral. Everyone does it. There's an unspoken rule that you can't complain because eventually do you'll do it too.

And so, rain, anomalies, and any form of disturbance last week was blamed on the Water Festival deaths and disturbance in the spirit worlds. It caused some genuine trepidation and fear; fear that the spirit world was somehow unbalanced which lead to the accident, and fear that the recently dead spirits would cause an even greater disturbance. Sometimes it's hard for me to understand such tradition as a Westerner. But this is what death means here, and the consideration for the happiness of others is touching. Lets hope we're so considerate while they're alive.