How to Visit Bali

Back in August 2012, my friend Rachel and I were at a baby shower. We realized and neither of us had Christmas plans. We went back to her apartment and researched where the cheapest flights in December would take us. The best option was Bali. This is how we decided to go to Bali.

Last year, my family lived in East Timor and they went to Bali repeatedly. I therefore decided I needed to go to Bali as well. Originally, we planned to go to Bali together this Christmas. However, they moved to Haiti so I went without them.

I'm still learning how to do [survive? endure? enjoy? ignore?] Christmas as a grown-up. One important lesson I have learned is that without your family, you make your friends your family and you fill your time with fun. I appreciate Rachel making my 24th Christmas absolutely excellent.

Balinese Highlights

Singapore!! I greatly love Singapore. You could eat of the street in Singapore. Everything is perfect, ordered, clean, modern and beautiful. Both coming and going to Bali, we had an overnight layover in Singapore. This offered the unique opportunity of finally seeing the "Gardens by the Bay" with the famous "Supertrees." We even walked on the suspended platform around the Supertrees for some of the most glorious views of the city and the Flyer. We also met up with a friend of Rachel's at a cute coffee shop where we ate the most delicious (and expensive) cheesecake I've ever experienced.

Beaches (Kuta): Bali's beaches are legendary and they did not fail to disappoint. The main beach town is Kuta which is where all the drunk Aussies party. The bars open at 3pm, bar after bar after bar and Aussies wandering around town in bikinis, shirtless and in board shorts. We wandered the art market, wandered the mall with all the Western shops we can't get in Cambodia, and walked along the beautiful beaches. We stayed a good 20 minutes outside of Ubed close to a quieter beach.

Ubed: Ubed is known as a cultural center of Bali. This is where you go to escape the drunk Aussies [hey! even the Aussies know they are frightfully annoying in Bali!]. In Ubed you find art, temples, yoga and meditation and adorable cafes and vegetarian friendly restaurants. It's in the hills along a windy little road well over a kilometer long. We explored the little boutiques and temples, overwhelmed by the adorableness and yet touristy feel of everything. Our hotel was further outside down in the middle of a rice field, a little villa all to ourselves.

Rafting: I wasn't immediately down for this activity. However, with some convincing, I relented. After all, saying that you went rafting in Bali makes for the best story. Our trip was about two hours long on class three rapids. Thankfully, we started far up river with the good rapids and few other people. The river was almost in a gorge and you looked up and cliffs and jungle vines. I was almost over stimulated by all the colors and the vivid green! It may be one of the most beautiful places I've seen, in all my worldwide adventures. The river was warm and shallow and though we never actually fell off the raft, we got completely and utterly soaked.

Moto driving and Rice: Much to our amusement, in Ubed the roads are really only one lane wide. They are windy and small and vehicles must crawl around curves to make room for each other. We know this because we rented a moto one day and drove far out into the countryside. We saw beautiful rice fields, beautiful temples, and Indonesians living their lives completely unaware of the chaotic touristy invasion onto their island. We stalked the elusive volcano that dominates the Bali horizon, but clouds intercepted our quest.

Starbucks: We don't have Starbucks in Cambodia. It's not a problem because we have Brown, Blue Pumpkin and Java. However, whenever you leave Cambodia, Starbucks is something of a signpost that you've reach civilization. This signpost, we only visited five times? or was it six? Who knows, but we hit the entire holiday drink menu...possibly twice. We actually spent the better part of Christmas afternoon playing card games at Starbucks.

Indonesian & Indian Food: Indonesian food is amazing. Anything covered in peanut sauce is amazing. By far the highlight of our trip was an Indian restaurant with the most amazing Indian food I have tasted in my life. We also found a favorite cafe restaurant in Ubed (Kue) which we frequented three times. Any holiday must be filled with amazing good, and this was no exception.

Games: Rachel can be strongly credited for helping me discover what was already within me...a love for board games. We kept a running score of the hours of games we played in Bali...Carcassonne, Dominion, Monopoly Deal, Lost Cities, and Blocus. I may have won the overall Bali game tournament, but Rachel never tallied the actual score but pretty sure I was just barely ahead.

How not to visit Da Lat

Staff retreat number three for 2012 wins as the most exotic and unexpected retreat of the past two years. This was also my third staff retreat with my most beloved partner organization. As a fitting tribute to our third year together, the crowning jewel of a destination was none other than…Vietnam. Excitement about this retreat had begun all the way back in August, followed up by many meetings to discuss various options.

For about half of the staff in my partner organization, this was their first time out of the country. This was a big deal. It was also my first time to Vietnam, even though I live five hours from the border. The chosen destination was Da Lat (otherwise known as Dalat). Da Lat is famous as a French getaway town in the highlands north of Ho Chi Minh City (otherwise known as Saigon or HCMC). In Da Lat, there are strawberries and local wine and its famous for being beautiful, cool and it's distinctly European architecture. 

I thought I was going to Da Lat for two days, plus two days of travel. I was quite looking forward to the adventure! I was interested to seeing everyone’s reactions, as well as resuming my "awkward moment" posture which I take on work adventures (smile and analyze). I was interested to see Vietnam which creates love/hate reactions. Instead, well, see for yourself.

Monday: I arrived at the meeting location at the designated 5am. We proceeded to pick up various staff members and finally got to the border crossing around 9am. In totality, we spent 17 hours in the road. There was some complaining that we only stopped every two hours for snacks/bathroom/etc instead of every one hour. Our driver also insisted on driving under the speed limit, which was downright weird. It was also interesting to observe how Cambodians are treated at the Cambodian boarder.

Favorite Memories: Taking pictures outside every gas station when we refueled ("Look Mom! I'm in Vietnam!!") Seeing wild fields of marijuana alongside the road like grass (pretty sure it was marijuana!). The nativity sets with tin-foil backdrops outside almost every business.

Tuesday: Tuesday we had the entire day in Da Lat! I wore a sweater most the day! I also enjoyed spending time with our staff and we found many of the same things interesting. Our adventures included:

• Visiting a garden where one takes pictures (Cambodians love taking photos )
• Visiting a valley where one takes pictures (Taking still more pictures)
• Visiting Bao Dai's Summer Palace (Vietnamese history)
• Taste tasting local fruits/juices/jams
• A waterfall visit involving a small roller coaster
• Nap time (during which I found a cute coffee shop for my introverted "me time")
• Night/evening market
• Two team building exercises 

Favorite Memories: Taking photos in front of every single imaginable flower/plant. Being paranoid that the Vietnamese were going to cheat us. Everyone buying winter hats because it was 68F. 

Wednesday: We left at 8am to drive back Ho Chi Minh City. This trip took eight hours. On the way, I learned that we would be leaving HCMC very early the next morning for Phnom Penh. I was extremely vexed for having not realized this earlier and arranged to stay an extra day, though I suspected the decision had been made hours beforehand (Cambodian style). At any rate, this day involved spending eight hours on a bus with my audio book and struggling to feel positive about my driving tour through Southern Vietnam. Upon reaching the outskirts of HCMC, we went to a Chinese-themed amusement park which was completely empty except for us. We had dinner on a boat outside the city followed by a driving tour through the fancy districts of HCMC.

Favorite Memories: Shock and awe at HCMC overpass/flyovers. Wonder and awe at Vietnamese development. The realization by my colleagues that I possess substantial knowledge about traveling in Southeast Asia and that this information is useful to them.

Thursday: We got up at 7am, went to the large HCMC market, left HCMC at 10am and arrived back in Phnom Penh by 5pm. 

Favorite Memories: Getting home and being alone again! The preference for markets over stores.

In conclusion, I would not trade this trip for anything. My soul was refreshed in the few precious hours spent in lush green with rolling hills, trees and flowers familiar to my North American eye. Any opportunity to see green is highly valued by Phnom Penh-ers. I rarely get to travel with Cambodians and I love my colleagues and seeing the world through their eyes. However, we all agreed overwhelmingly that it was just too short of a trip!

How to Drive like a Cambodia: Part 2

After continuing to observe traffic over the last few weeks, I realized just how much you can learn if you truly apply yourself. Dear readers are not encouraged to implement these actions in your country of origin. However, if you happen to visit the Kingdom, live in the Kingdom or have reflected on any abstract way on the Kingdom, expect to see these moves.



Car blocking: When you need to do a left-hand turn, position yourself behind a car. They will block for you and than you can quickly overtake them later. Do not immediately pass the car which is blocking for you as you could get hit.

Front Cutting: Say there is a traffic light with a significant amount of waiting traffic. It's considered acceptable to pull into oncoming traffic, drive on the other side of the double yellow line until you have reached the front of the line, preferably parked on the zebra crossing. (Recently cars started pulling this move which creates massive problems.) If traffic is really bad, than oncoming traffic won't be able to pass. Traffic reaches a gridlocked standstill where no one can move. This is extremely routine. The notion that collective waiting and taking turns might improve the situation is not there. You may also drive on all available sidewalks, anything getting you any advantage.

Cutting Stations: Say you want to do a right hand turn at an intersection and there is a petrol station on that corner. You may unquestionably cut through the gas station. Even if there is a green light, still cut through the petrol station. Even if there is a ramp especially for right hand turns, still cut through the petrol station.

Penn Left: If you are at a red stoplight and wish to turn left. You attentively watch the clock countdown. The moment it hits green, you zip out as fast as possible before the oncoming traffic reaches your side, bending sharply to provide room for those oncoming traffic to continue straight. I've heard this called "a Pennsylvania Left." [Someone somewhere hates Pennsylvania. I don't hate Pennsylvania.]

Traffic Packs: Suppose there is a heck of a lot of oncoming traffic preventing your crossing. You wait until several other cars and motos want to make the same move. Typically there is one daredevil moto who will lead the pack, setting the pace for the rest of the creeping motos. His success is based entirely on how successfully he taunts oncoming traffic to stop. Together, slowly, everyone starts moving forward in a pack, a few inches per second, until all oncoming traffic is forced to stop. This is how traffic functions in general especially when there aren't lights, the largest pack forcing their way forwards. When traffic from the other direction produces a larger pack, than they will force forward. This is a metaphor for life in Cambodia; stay in the pack, and you are safe and protected.

Arm Indication: If you're going to make a significant turn in traffic, it's common that your passenger will indicator the turn. This requires a full arm extension in the direction of the turn and a sharp up/down flapping from the wrist. Occasionally, a solo driver on the moto will make this indication (for left hand turns only, because the accelerator is controlled by your right hand). The arm indicator is no guarantee that you will be allowed to be turn, but a reduction in the probability of being hit.

Intersection Insanity: Say you're waiting on a red light. You see an opening in traffic. Hello! Take it, idiot! That red light is for...who knows who that's for... There is a direct correlation between this move and helmet-free drivers. 

Tenting Anguish: Side note, at bothersome times over the year, a fun traffic obstacle are the tents on the street for  weddings/funerals/parties with no notice to neighbors whatsoever. You must smile and then move on. I'm joking... suppress your rage. Cambodians deal with it in a culturally appropriate manner, they keep quiet, as is expected, rather than loosing face. As a foreigner, you're bound to similar standards, swallow it and move on. No one ever said it made sense.

This Post is for 2012

Moments from 2012 to welcome in 2013

If I had to summarize 2012 in one word, this would be easy. 2012 was brilliant. So many brilliant things occurred this year. Frankly, most of these adventures have already been chronicles in the web pages of this blog. But I need this experience, the experience of writing this post, to express my overwhelming gratitude. 2011 was rough. I knew little. I felt lost and confused. 2012 was a solid chunk of time. Many of my blessings were unexpected; an unexpected evening with friends, and unplanned night of board games, Avengers or Batman at the cinema, a new cheesecake restaurants and cafes, new children to whom I'm "Ming Grace," new books I've loved, new music I've danced to, and blog posts I've crafted. So many of my cherished moments were not crafted. They happen. And I'm eternally grateful. I had some brilliant adventures in new places and I've also learned a lot.

Adventures Had

1)   International New Year’s Eve Singapore: The glamorous lights on the glitzy Marina Bay where I prayed and wished for a glorious year.

2)   Bali: Temples, beaches, games, and food.

3)   A Southern Vietnam Driving Tour: 40 hours in a bus over four days? Check! Also flowers in the shape of the Vietnamese flag.

4)   Koh Thmei, KYN 2012: Laying in the sand, watching boats, reading books with friends.

5)   USA 2012: Family/Jon, bikes, Target…in that order.

6)   Sihanouk’s Death: Learning how much I don’t know about Cambodia.

7)   Chiang Mai Thailand: Lanterns and food, paradise.

Lessons Learned

8)   Wake up every day with gratitude

9)   Ask the fundamental questions: “how would you do this?” “tell me what do you think?” “can you explain this to me a little bit better?”

10)   Ask for help when you need it.

I have two goals for 2013…to get a new job…and to move somewhere I have never lived before. I’ve lived in a mere nine countries and six states...that leave literally 75% of the earth left to work with (and yeah, I would totally take North Korea or Iran if offered, who wouldn’t!). An unofficial goal is to visit two new countries and get that number up to 30, but we shall see. It does seem quite likely. A final goal? Keep my eyes wide open for unexpected joys and unexpected lessons.

How to Drive like a Cambodian: Part 1

An average day in the Kingdom...

Over the past few months, the Kingdom's traffic has become awful. In August 2012, I started to notice my errands taking longer and longer. Around September 2012 a Cambodia Daily report shared that tens of thousands of new motos and thousands of cars have been added to the roads over the last year. The number of roads is static, road quality is not (that is decreasing). Many sections of town are getting some sort of new underground piping system, so numerous roads are out of commission, leading to greater congestion.

To cope in this increasingly dog-eat-dog, you must fully commit to Khmer road moves. Originally, I thought this would be one post. Yet as I continued to reflect, observe and process my growing intolerance towards fellow drivers, I concluded this would have to be a two-part series. There are just too many bad driving decisions one can make in the Kingdom. I keep observing new ways to break the law and bother everyone else. Much frustration comes from the sentiment that I am already driving on the edge of reckless (sometimes, just sometimes), so why do I feel like I'm constantly loosing? But if anything, life is not fair, and I must stomach my pride.

For the record, we drive on the right side of the road in the Kingdom (former French colony).

Keep Moving: As a general moto driving rule, you don't want to stop. The goal is to constantly move forward. Preferably, no one else has to stop either. As a result, you weave around everything, slowing down, but not stopping unless it's completely necessary.

Wrong Sides: Suppose that you just can't get across the road because there is so much oncoming traffic. Rather than wait patiently, you may start driving slowly, against traffic, very close to the curb, on the wrong side of the road. You may thus creep slowly until an opening in traffic when you quickly pull into the correct lane at full speed. (Oddly enough, this is one of the few times that people will use their indicators, demonstrating they are trying to cross, as if justifying the sin). Often people will start by creeping on the wrong side, right out of the gate.

Sightless Rights: If you need to turn right, don't bother checking for oncoming traffic. Mysteriously, no one ever looks, ever. Just pull right and pray that other drivers will swerve to accommodate you.

Double Lefties: Say you reach a T-intersection and need to turn left. Don't sit in the middle of the road and try to turn. Get to the furthest left possible so that you're smack in the path of anyone turning right.

Passing Effectively: Careful drivers pass on the right. Aggressive drivers pass on the left, swerving into oncoming traffic. Idiots weave through traffic while conducting a combination of both. Pass for everything going a fraction of a half-second slower than you. You will encounter interesting combinations; ex. truck is passing car which is passing moto which is passing tuk tuk which is avoiding pothole. By that point, there's no lane for oncoming traffic which presents other problems.

Placement Particulars: As a general rule cars drive on the left close to the median and motos drive on the right by the curb. Bikes stay as close to the curb as possible.

Lexus>Cars>Motos>tuktuks>bikes>people: This is the social order. Often cars and Lexus will drive down the center of the road honking all the way, expecting the wave of motos to open like a sea before them. This will frequently occur and motos will move. I feel obligated to drive slow in front of a honking car because though it's perhaps old-fashioned, but I still think public roads are for the entire public.

Defensive Horns: As a general rule, a moto will use one's horn in a friendly manner, I'm here, don't hit me. Rarely is it used as an expression of anger. The car will use the horn with entitlement, I'm here, so MOVE! I must admit that I try to use mine for public shaming. I can't say that it's working.