How to reenter Your Own Culture

The reason I'd write about reentry is because...I don't understand it. I should because I've been doing it going on 10 years but I still have no idea how to handle it! It hits you differently each time because each time you leave, you experience something different overseas and that affects how you view your own culture. It was different reentering from France then it was a year ago reentering from Ethiopia.

This time it was a little more challenging for several reasons, mainly because after a year putting a huge effort into speaking French, understanding the French culture and trying very much to be French and blend into the French culture, to suddenly step off a plane and hear everyone yelling in loud American English was odd, shocking, bizarre and confusing. Wait a minute! I don't have to struggle to express myself! I can just speak what comes to mind without worrying where the adjective and pronouns fit into my sentences!
All that goes to say, in my African expat communities, we know we can't fit in. It's just not possible and as a result, we build our little third cultures and create our own entities. In Europe you look like them, live a developed lifestyle like them and after learning the language, appear to be them. No one knows the difference riding the metro to work!

There are several different things I do reentering my American home that make it feel normal again.

1) Sleep a lot when you get back. Jet-leg will keep you in an over-emotional, irrational, hyper-sensitive state where you think the world is crashing upon you, no one cares about you and overseas living has ruined you for life. Just get on the right time zone before questioning your existence.

2) Take several long walks. Talk to yourself, philosophize to yourself, pray out loud, write books out loud, sort out what you enjoyed most about your overseas experience. It helps.

3) Make two lists. One about the things you have to be grateful for. Seriously, you are so blessed to just be alive to be able to return home for good or for a a short period of time. The second is a list of things you like about living overseas, things you've learned, and things you've enjoyed. If it's the end of an overseas experience like France for me, it helps bring closure and a sense of joy and delight about the time spent there.

4) Don't judge. Even though people move on, culture shifts, places look different, don't judge it instantly as negative. Just decide it's different and work out later if it's positive or negative.

5) Never never never give in. Just hang in there. Mr. Churchill said it and did it. So can we.