How SPI Saved EMU (For Me)

This post is unique. It's a personal confession. (I wish I could say it'll be as history-altering as Augustine's "Confessions"). In earlier posts I've told the tale of my relocation to the United States to study peacebuilding at Eastern Mennonite University. My first academic semester was challenging. It's difficult moving to a new country. It's difficult adjusting to a new environment, new norms, and new standards. The problem is exacerbated when you're constantly reminded it's your country. It's where you belong, these are your people so...like...dude....what's your problem?

Many of my problems during this semester began with me. I sought perfect grades where I might have socialized. I hid when I should have spoken out. I kept silent when I should have asserted myself. Yet the legitimacy of my faith was constantly questioned coming from a non-Mennonite background. Everything from my political affiliations, my views on the military, my views on certain protracted conflicts, my opinions on globalization, my opinions on global living and the environment, and certainly my non-Mennonite heritage were challenged and belittled. I felt judged, ignored and irrelevant in a school which claims to celebrate diversity. EMU refuses to fly an American flag on campus, a statement they are citizens of a "global village" and a symbol they are creating a "safe space" where people can express themselves. Yet as a self-professed product of globalization, I felt unwelcome. This was certainly not the intention of many people. This was instead the reality.

I ended the semester on the Dean's List yet incredibly frustrated and angry over what I perceived as rejection. Yet my summer job at SPI changed helped me process these feelings of resentment. I was only on staff. I didn't participate in the classes, discussions or many of the events yet I found that diversity I was seeking. With people from over 35 nations, there was stronger commitment to creating a "safe space." Part of my job was to insure that on-campus students were able to create judgement-free community. Unlike many undergraduates, SPI peacebuilders have acknowledged the world is screwed up. They realize they are only ever going to make small steps towards change. They are less idealistic, less judgemental, and more open to solutions in unusual packages. Because of this, they respect their neighbor and openly extended friendship. I felt this atmosphere. I felt respected for my small contributions. I didn't really say anything. I simply appreciated the acceptance. I needed it. I learned that truly wonderful people, come in truly unusual packages.

So in a way this a plug for Summer Peacebuilding Institute. SPI is awesome. That's the only word I can think of. I needed this experience to help me move forward. This was my epiphany. This was the light at the end of my tunnel. This was where I resolved to be a better person. What will it take for you?