How Frisbee is the National Sport

One of DC most famous locations is "The Mall"...a long stretch of grass flanked by multiple museums, with the Capital at one end and the Lincoln Memorial at the other. In the center stands the the Washington Monument (I got my ticket to visit in the mail today, ha!). The Mall is a nice stretch of grass available for all sorts of activities.

Saturday I ate my lunch at The Mall (on The Mall? in The Mall? Uhhh....). While my favorite Bollywood song charged through my Ipod, I enjoyed a feast of visual amusement. I watched the tourist in Chicos wandering up and down hitting the sites, taking photos with the Capital or Monument in the background. Many attempting to humor their screaming children with promises of treats or threats of naps. There were a few bikers (also in Chicos), a few isolated individuals attempted to make political statements (mostly in dreadlocks)...and then there were the athletes (also frequently in Chicos).

I've been on The Mall quite a few times. It's taken a while to crash all the museums. I've always been amused by what people do on that grass. If it was France, Kenya, Zambia, or most places on earth, soccer enthusiasts would be kicking a spotted ball around. It it had been Zim or Pak, the insane cricket freaks would be standing bored in white outfits waiting to dash after a red cork ball. But this is America. And the only sport people engage in on the green Mall is....Frisbee. Once I saw baseball which was drawing a sizable crowd, but that's it. I was amazed, and humored.

I wondered what this said about the American culture. I deduced several good things. It's easy to join in on Frisbee. It's easy to learn. It's easy to play. The equipment is super cheap. It's sociable and you can talk while you play. Anyone of any age, size, gender, ethnic background can join in. There's some skill involved in Frisbee but it's hard to feel like an idiot no one's left feeling like an idiot. Frisbee enthusiasts play the more sophisticated, "ultimate Frisbee" which because I've never played, I can't in good faith blog about it but I've heard is fantabulous.

Thus, through inductive reasoning, I theorize that Frisbee is the national sport. Now like good capitalists we need to develop the perfectly shaped Frisbee, the right color, the right squeezable grips on the sides, and then outsource production to Asia and sell them en mass on Amazon.com. It's the American way. Go find a Frisbee. Embrace it. It's a pretty fun sport.

How to Ride the DC Public Transit System

Riding public transport is currently the rage for several reasons. 1) It's now more economical. 2) it's now more environmentally friendly (because before, it just wasn't), and 3) it's simply easier. I've historically gone to great lengths to express my unflinching support of public transit. I've spent a good deal of my time whinging that America needs more trains (and my college town needs a bus system that runs more then every hour). So imagine my unspeakable joy arriving in DC and once again being united with the power to achieve great things...via the metro.

Four days after I arrived in DC and my first day of work, there was a massive metro accident at 5pm rush hour right outside my home station of Takoma. I opted out of the metro because the whole system was utterly screwed up. So after pouring over bus maps and getting turned around, getting somewhat lost, and being on many occasionally embarrassingly late to work, I believe to have discovered...the tricks of the trade.

1. Get to the bus stop early. The bus is never on time. Mostly, it's late. But then again it could be early. You never know. You have to guess. And most importantly, you have to be early.


2. You must have a SmartTrip card. The flat bus fare is $1.25 with free transfers for up to three hours. Or you can pay cash every ride for $1.35. It's almost always cheaper then the metro. Metro increases it's fares during rush hours by almost a third so it does add up. On the weekend "regular hours," I take the metro but only if I don't plan on any transfers within a three hour period.


3. You must be pushy. People in DC are incredibly pushy and rude. I confess I was shocked when a woman cut me off the first time. I'd let elderly people, or small children go before me (duh!) but to have a rotund women several inches shorter then me in perfectly decent health practically kills in order to board the bus before me...crass. People for all their pushy-ness, typically give up their seats for the elderly and handicap...sometimes children.


4. You must remember the importance of gender sensitivity. Men sit next to men. Women sit next to women. It's just how it goes. However, (like in the French language) exceptions always exist during rush hours. Typically people will stand rather than sit next to someone of the opposite gender and causing discomfort.


5. You must pretend to be busy. The phone rules (I mean the Blackberry). You may do whatever you wish with your phone, texting preferred, loud talking forbidden. On the metro, people read the newspaper. On the bus, they read a novel, or "The Express," or listen to their mp3 devise. Don't speak to anyone, even if you're traveling with someone. Except children. Apparently you're allowed to scream at your child.